Saturday was my 24th birthday. My friends and I went to the Foshay Tower in downtown Minneapolis. Swanky is about the only word I can think of that appropriately describes the two bars located there. Prohibition and The Living Room are expensive and “cool”. And here, in the “cool” environment with all the “cool” city dwellers, I really wanted to be a "cool" smoker again. Now, the weird thing is that I didn’t notice any insane cravings or triggers of the standard color. Except, of course, for when we stepped from the cab and into the haze of smokers’ smoke outside the main entrance. Most civilians hate this. I, on the other hand, really enjoy the comradery of the outside smokers club. On Saturday, I did not want to be smoking, but I wanted to be a smoker.
But to get back to my original point, they’re all so cool. Now I know smokers are not all gems. I’ve over heard my share of inane conversations on the smoke break. And I also know that the cardinal rule of doing cool things is that you don't talk about how cool they are. And it is decidedly less cool to do cool things because they're cool. So I'm left just being that lame kid sitting at the cool kids table. But I digress, what I am saying is that there is something very hipster about smoking in the 21st century. And in Minneapolis, Hipsters rule the streets and coffee shops (the smokers' paradise).
Now, as I stated yesterday, I’ve been feeling like a piece of fabric winding itself into a tight knot. I cannot escape the constant desire to hold a cigarette again. But, oddly, I don’t think that I will. I’ve pretty much made up my mind here and while I know I’m not exactly the most self-disciplined individual I have my moments.
So, I’ve told one of my darkest secrets. I smoked to be cool. I really liked smoking and hanging out with smokers and talking about smokers’ problems and smokers’ rights. Oh, it was a great community to be a part of. I’m going to miss it. And I already know that I am going to try to keep at least one foot out the door: (get it, because smokers always have to go outside).
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