Quitter’s Log, 11/29/11

I had my last cigarette at 4pm yesterday. Monday seemed a good day to quit, for two reasons: one, because my teeth will be pulled this Friday and the suction caused by smoking, similar to that of sipping from a straw, can cause dry sockets – yuck. And two, because my pack was low, and I know I don’t want to try to quit while I still have some cigarettes. That would foolhardy. So, my afternoon cigarette came and went without much drama. I smoked alone. Told my boss it was my last when I returned to my desk. She’s thrilled; bought me tootsie pops to ease the oral frustration. It’s sweet. I don’t know if it’ll help. Which brings me to my point: I have never tried to quite before. I decided to try cold turkey for no more grand a reason than at heart I’m kind of lazy. It’s convenience. I can do cold turkey without having to remember a patch/pill/inhaler or seeing a doctor or spending any more money on nicotine. And bonus, you can’t deny the literary fun of going cold turkey while the house is filled with cold turkey. It is 10:20 am on Tuesday Nov. 29, 2011. I have now gone 18 hours and 20 minutes without nicotine. My boss and co-smoker think I should get the patch (soon!) but ….as mentioned before, the inconvenience. I will probably get some tonight, but maybe tomorrow…or Thursday. Which means it could be more than 72 hours before I have nicotine flowing through my blood stream again. The weirdest part of all is that I’m not sure how I feel. The habit of smoking was such a vast element of my enjoyment that I’m struggling to distinguish between the physiochemical withdrawal, and the emotional grieving. I hear this is common, that most individuals are more addicted to the habit than the drug. However, recent and not-so-recent studies show that nicotine can be as addictive as heroin or cocaine. Yickes. When I read things like that, Im all: “how can anyone succeed? I saw The Fighter, heroin is no joke. Christian Bale had to go to jail to kick it. I’m just blogging.” But then again, many people have quit smoking, so why the fuck can’t I? And here we go….